Always
by A.C. Castle
Summary: he could think only in that moment. spoilers for 3x13 knockdown! about the kiss, nothing on the actual case x  rated T just in case D:


**A/N: HI, so i just saw 3x13 knockdown yesterday (i'm from Venezuela so i have to download it T_T) it was AMAZING, and the kiss OMG O_O. After that i saw this tweet of Castle that he said something about having to write it all down... thats what started this idea, so in college i was bored, with pen, paper, and voalá :3 **

**Again, i'm not an english native speaker so sorry for any mistakes! i do what a can :3 **

**Reviews are love, people. Love me XD**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Castle o the characters or anything like that. **

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All he could thing about was that kiss. He decided to put it all on paper, his third Nikki Heat novel was about half way done, but that kiss. He had described a similar situation of that moment on the book, only Jameson and Nikki had already been together so the necessity for describing a simple kiss, shared by them in numerous occasions before, just wouldn't fit. Plus, Kate would kill him if she knew how he had felt…well, on words. He was sure she knew, he practically poured his soul out on that moment.

Of course, now he could describe with a better accuracy the hot scenes on the series of upcoming novels, but he wasn't thinking that far ahead. Hell, he couldn't even write! Not by lack of inspiration, definitely not that. His hand still hurt him, the pain killers were helping but he didn't want to risk a permanent injury. It was more of an 'I don't know where to put it' thing. Then, he had an idea. Brilliant, even for him.

He logged to a Castle fan site, under a false name, false email account, the whole shebang. You see, he read a while ago that fans wrote these stories called fan fictions, based on a character, book, series, you name it. He had read quite a few over the years, some were really good, great writing and story, others were kind of crazy ideas but he liked them. So, he was going to write a fan fiction about the first kiss of Jameson and Nikki.

After a good hour, he had taken the time to write real slowly because of his hand, he was done. He remembered the moment, how he had grabbed her hand and face, maybe a little too drastically, but he needed to stop her from reaching the gun. The look of shock on her eyes when she realized what he was going to do. The feeling of her lips against his, soft but with no emotion, at first. He had pushed away, been afraid of what he might do if it lasted any longer, and then it had happened. She had kissed him, this time, oh, this time was different, and there was emotion, feelings. And the moan, he swears he had a heart attack on that moment.

He had written the fan fiction with Rooks point of view. Once he was over, he posted it and was able to relax a little. He went to bed and tried to sleep but he played the moment on his head, over and over again, he was thinking not just the kiss, he was thinking of the repercussions, Beckett was still with _Josh_, he had just broken up with Gina; not that he cared. He hadn't cared about Gina for a long time now.

He knew he loved Kate, well, he was at denial at first, who wouldn't? She was his partner, his friend. Unfortunately that kiss had just made it more real and impossible to deny it now. But he couldn't be selfish now, he had to think what made Beckett happy, if been her friend and nothing more would, so he would suck it up. He would be there for her, he had promised her, and he owned her that much. That 'always' had a deeper meaning; he knew she knew that, her eyes had told her so. He would wait, he decided. As long as it took; been there, helping her. He could only hope destiny had planes for them different that just friends.

He was dozing off when he heard a bip coming from his laptop. It was the funny account for the fic. He had a review; well, this certainly was going to be fun. It said something about how it felt like reading an actually Richard Castle novel, that made him smile.

After responding something to the reviewer, he logged off and closed the account. He had this urge to write to Beckett, asking her how she felt, if there was something he could do. He didn't. He would wait until the next time he would see her. He was learning how to be patient. I wasn't going to be easy, been as spoiled as a 9 year-old single id with rich parents. But her happiness was all he really truly wanted and he would wait. In the mean time he had the memory and the promise of Always.

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What did you think? please tell :3


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